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Johnny English Top Quotes !

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Johnny English: Are you here in some professional capacity?Image result for johnny english


Lorna Campbell: I work in the restoration of the jewels.


Johnny English: Intriguing.


Lorna Campbell: And yourself?


Johnny English: [Chuckles] If I told you that, I'm afraid I'd have to kill you.


Lorna Campbell: I'd like to see you try.


Carlos Vendetta: That's a letter of abdication renouncing your claims to the throne and the claims of your entire family. Sign it.


[the Queen reads the abdication sign and puts her pen down]


Queen: Never.


[Vendetta picks up the Queen's dog and threatens to shoot it. The Queen solemnly signs the abdication note]


[in a sushi bar, the waiter brings glasses of saké; English and Campbell toast each other]


Lorna Campbell: [in Japanese] Cheers.


Johnny English: [in Japanese] May all your daughters be born with three bottoms.


Archbishop of Canterbury: And do you, the chosen Bishops of England, Wales and Scotland, assent to this anointment?


Scottish Bishop: For Scotland I do.


Welsh Bishop: For Wales I do.


Johnny English: For England


[Pulls off bishop's clothing]


Johnny English: *I do not*!


Johnny English: A good agent doesn't need gadgets. The only gadgets I've ever needed are a sharp eye, sensitive hearing and a whole bunch of bigger brains.



Johnny English: My *bottom* will be king of England before you are.



Official at Funeral: Everything in order, English?


Johnny English: I think you'll find it's rather more than just in order, Sir. You are now entering the most secure location in the whole of England.


[a bomb explodes in the distance, killing all the British agents]


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[English is whistling a note that is gradually rising in pitch, to find the resonant frequency which will unlock the door of the prison cell. Suddenly the whistle goes silent]


Lorna Campbell: I can't hear anything.


Johnny English: I'm into ultrasonic.


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[Johnny and Bough are in a dark tunnel]


Johnny English: It may be pitch black, but we can still see.


Bough: Can we, sir? How?


Johnny English: The Bedouin monks of the Al Maghreb mountains developed a system of sonic chanting.


Bough: I see, sir.


Johnny English: The sound of their chanting would bounce back off any obstacles, and using their highly tuned ears they could paint a mental picture of the path ahead.


Bough: Brilliant, sir.


Johnny English: However, you must always sing in E-flat.


Johnny English: [singing] E-flat, E-flat, E-flat... Thank you for the music / The songs I'm singing


Bough: Is it working, sir?


Johnny English: Extremely well, thank you, Bough.


Johnny English: [singing] Thanks for all the joy that...


[Johnny hits the tunnel wall]


Johnny English: Ow!


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[Lorna sees Sauvage the Frenchman standing just behind English, who thinks that he's just another waiter in the party, not knowing that it's truly Sauvage, who also listens to everything they say]


Lorna Campbell: You obviously haven't met our host, Monsieur Savage.


Johnny English: No, thank God! You know, I think I'd rather have my bottom impaled on a giant cactus than exchange pleasantries with that jumped-up Frenchman. As far as I'm concerned, the only thing the French should be allowed to host is an invasion.


[English chuckles, then attemps to take a drink out of his glass, but just then notices Sauvage standing right behind him, not realizing that it's actually him instead of just one of the waiters, and that he has just heard English's insult]


Johnny English: [looking over at him] Sorry, can I help?


Pascal Sauvage: [into English's face] Pascal Sauvage.


[Sauvage reaches out to shake Lorna's hand]


Pascal Sauvage: The jumped-up Frenchman.


Lorna Campbell: Lorna Campbell. I've been so looking forward to meeting you.


Pascal Sauvage: Enchanté.


[English is now looking dumbstruck and stammering in embarrassment]


Pascal Sauvage: Of course, you are Johnny English. I've heard all about you. And between you and me, I'm not so keen on the French myself.


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